------ISAT------

Chesapeake:

Walking up to Chesapeake, it wasn't too hard to figure out which side was housing freshmen — a kid had just walked out of the East Side with a duffel bag. OK, let's think back to freshman year everybody smuggled cases of beer in their dorm with a duffel bag. However, this bag was filled with empty cans. Hey champ, there is no need to be smuggling empties out of your dorm, once you've done your drinking just throw them in your lovely blue JMU recycling bin and leave it outside your door.

After duffel-bag boy let me in, it became apparent that the dorm was struggling on this Saturday afternoon. Walking up the stairs you could hear that the only action was happening on the fourth floor. The music was blaring and everyone's doors were open.

The consensus from these guys was that the fifth-floor girls are best (at what, use your own imagination) and J. claims that "second-floor guys are a bunch of fags" (hey, I didn't say it).

Although Chesapeake has its intra-dorm rivalry between the floors, there isn't much intra-dorm hooking up going on (yet). Most of the guys here have done the Walk of Shame (or is it the Walk of Glory since it's a guy?) more times than I could keep track of. One guy has walked home from the Row, and last night he left with two girls only to wake up in a field by himself. Interesting.

The Chesapeake RAs are pretty cool, unless you're one girl's friend who gave the smart-ass answer of "I'm drinking Dr. Pepper Š. and a friend." She might as well have just answered "I-Doc please." R. (a guy from the second floor who isn't a fag) loves living here because it reminds him of a hotel, (umm, OK) and feels that he will keep off the freshmen fifteen because of all the walking. I say that's just wishful thinking. Chesapeake needs to spice it up a little, on a scale of one to sexy, they're barely NC-17.

Potomac:

Right next door to the ŒPeake is Potomac. Three girls were running out the East Side sporting their FYI lanyards. Please invest in a key chain. As soon as I had stepped foot in Potomac I heard music, yelling and the smell of pizza still lingering in the air. The freshmeat, I mean freshmen, on the second floor say that they're definitely getting their share of play.

However, there are some drawbacks to hooking up in Potomac. C. was hooking up with a girl in his loft bed when she hit her head on the ceiling; C. started laughing so hard that his neighbor across the hall could hear him. So, if you ever go back to someone's room and they have a loft bed, I'd think twice before getting up there. Just go hook up in the lounge. It's been done plenty of times before.

If you ever find yourself smoking up, or drinking in a room on the second floor, and an RA comes, you can survive the jump out the window. But before you bail out, make sure your hall director isn't trying out the new camcorder that she just bought or you'll be caught on tape like seven guys here were.

The girl B. has been talking to found a black thong (which wasn't hers) mixed in with his clothes. What I want to know is why was she doing his laundry in the first place. These guys seem to be getting a lot of play, but from who I don't know.

One girl in Potomac said that "every time she goes out she's looking for some steak, but all she can find are french fries." The fifth-floor girls said they hang out with the fourth-floor guys, and the second and third floors chill together, why can't we all just get along? I'd say that Potomac is the sexiest dorm this side of the highway.

-------Bluestone------

Hoffman Hall:

Walking into Hoffman Hall, we could smell the familiar stench of puke and heard the babble of freshman voices and loud music. Red sticky stuff covered the stairwell and the wall on the second floor while the elevators were covered in puke. We knew these freshmen would have interesting stories to tell us.

Š First-floor boys took off the door to their room and set it on a couple of chairs for beer pong Šsaid wrestling matches are regular occurrences in the hall at 5 a.m. Š claimed the third-floor girls hook up better — but the second-floor girls are hotter Š

Š M. had ten girls in his room last night Š only thing left to show for it is a phone without an owner Š

Š M. went to a show, then some apartment parties, and came back to his room to find two people in his bed and someone passed out on the floor Š the people in his bed were apparently already finished with "whatever it was they had been doing" Š

Š M. said the guy across the hall was wondering where his roommate had wound up last night Š apparently the roommate bounces from bed to bed in the hall Š intra-dorm hooking up is definitely his thang Š

... Second-floor guy wondered why "all the ugly girls in our dorm are chicken heads ..."

ŠS. thinks the boys in her hall are all totally immature Š they crossed out the names on her dry-erase board and wrote "gay" Š the same boys hocked a greenish luegy on the board Š said that guys at parties will stand next to her at the perfect angle to see down her shirt Š

Š K. smelled weed coming in the window from downstairs Š when she went down to investigate, no one would answer her knocks on the door and other guys came out to "distract" her Š some drunk guy came in their room and tried to hit on her roommate Š he threatened to beat K. up because she told him to get outŠ

Logan Hall:

Walking into the majestic halls of Logan, it seems to be more of a tomb than a freshmen hall. (What's with giving a Bluestone hall to the freshmen anyway?) The only signs of life are the faint sounds of music coming from behind tightly closed doors. Apparently these freshmen have discovered one of the staples of college life already, as the hall had the faint aroma of stale ramen. The outlook of finding good dirt didn't look promising.

Š R. didn't get home at all last night Š who knows what she was up to? When she returned home after her Walk of Shame, she found a note left by her roommate insisting that the two talk Š at 4:30 that morning, other girls had asked the roommate who was in R's bed Š the roommate hadn't noticed before that anyone was there, then saw that it was the "weird girl's" boyfriend Š he was in R's bed butt-naked under the covers Š he claims to be a sleep walker Š others say he is a walking STD Š

Š J. has a bleeding foot from last night Š some guys told her they knew of another party, and took a "shortcut" through woods in the dark that only cut up her foot Š

Š Two girls have already been kicked out of Logan ... they were best friends at home until they decided to live with each other as freshmen, and the friendship quickly biodegraded Š they didn't want to share a phone, so they each brought separate phones, plugging and unplugging them Š when one girl caught the other using the wrong phone, all hell broke loose, the police had to be called, and the RA was up until 6 a.m. Š